


When Sirius Fell in Love with Remus

by simplysirius



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Feels, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Angst, M/M, One Shot, Pining, Relationship(s), Remus x Sirius, sirius x remus, wolfstar, wolfstar angst, wolfstar fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-17 12:34:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29592870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplysirius/pseuds/simplysirius
Summary: Sirius isn’t sure if he really believes in this whole love concept, but things change for the better when he finally meets Remus, and realizes that he couldn’t stop falling in love, even if he tried. Based on the song This is How You Fall in Love by Jeremy Zucker and Chelsea Cutler.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 68





	When Sirius Fell in Love with Remus

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr @simplysirius for daily fics and fan art! I also take requests :)

Sirius Black didn’t think he’d ever fall in love.

Falling in love required two things: freely giving his heart away, and someone to love him back.

Giving his heart away was a terrifying concept, because there was never any guarantee that it wouldn’t slip from a pair of shaking hands, shattering into a trillion tiny infinitesimal pieces. Sirius’ heart was already covered in bandages, the shards taped and knotted and shoved together, even if they didn’t fit right. There was only so much glue in the world, and Sirius was quickly running out. Finding someone to love him back was the impossible part, though; if his own parents couldn’t love him, why would anyone else?

But meeting Remus Lupin on the train that very first year of Hogwarts changed everything.

It was slow, at first, loving Remus. The boy with unruly golden curls and a constellation of scars splashed over his body was quiet, nervous, those first few hours after leaving King’s Cross, but by the time Hogsmeade was in sight, he was pressed against Sirius, their noses pushing against the window, fingers overlapping as they splayed across the glass.

When Sirius had his first nightmare, just hours after they had arrived at Hogwarts and settled into their new home, it was Remus who reached over and tugged his hand, welcoming him into his bed.

“I’m sorry,” Sirius tried to whisper, “it was…nothing.”

Remus shook his head, only the whites of his eyes visible in the thick darkness. “It’s okay. I get them too.”

“You do?”

“Yeah. Usually I just…try to think of happier things, you know? Like coming to Hogwarts. Or learning more about the history of magic. Things that make me smile.”

Sirius couldn’t help but giggle. “The history of magic makes you smile? It’s so boring.”

“It is not!” Remus objected, poking Sirius’ shoulder. They fell asleep together that night, and most nights afterwards. Laying beside Remus didn’t stop the nightmares from attacking, but the sound of his quiet breathing next to Sirius’ ear lulled him back to sleep.

Sirius followed Remus’ advice. He thought desperately of things that made him smile. Regulus, for one, always forced a grin so wide his cheeks hurt, but Regulus wasn’t here, and he was now alone with his parents, so the thought only made Sirius’ heart ache. Hogwarts made him happy; the first home that would actually ever feel like home. His new friends, too; James with his too-big glasses and devious glint, and especially Remus with his never-ending supply of chocolate and kind eyes.

But it wasn’t until their seventh year that Sirius realized something had changed.

Remus returned from the summer holiday three inches taller and all the more wiser, leaning against the rail of his trolley with one foot crossed in front of the other, the picture of sophisticated grace. He was nearly a man now, with the long lines and strong bones to prove it, a sense of purpose inherent in the way he watched the young first years run up and down the platform, gawking at the train. It was the first time Sirius could really see Remus Lupin, future professor and dashing young man, not just Remus Lupin, cunning best friend and sometimes-prefect.

Sirius nearly stopped dead in his tracks as he walked down the platform at King’s Cross, James’ trolley ramming into his heels as he stumbled forward.

“What the hell, Pads?” James barked, hurriedly righting his trunk before it toppled over.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, pushing forward, his eyes locked on Remus, who couldn’t help but laugh at the calamity. These were the moments he would miss next year, when, instead of boarding a train to Hogwarts, they would be walking down the street or hailing a cab to get to their grown up adult jobs.

“You always have to make an entrance,” Remus smiled, greeting Sirius with a tight hug. With the extra height, Sirius’ chin fit snugly in the dip of Remus’ collarbone, and he was only too glad that Remus was holding him up; Sirius didn’t trust his knees to carry the weight of a heart bursting at the seams.

It wasn’t that Remus was more handsome – he was – nor was it the nostalgia of leaving on their final train ride to Hogwarts – they were all terribly melancholy about the whole thing. There was something about the way the morning light kissed Remus’ skin, how, no matter where they were, be it the quaint Hogsmeade lanes or the shadowy passages underneath Hogwarts, everything burned brighter when Remus was around.

After the Great Feast, Sirius and Remus were alone in their bedroom, organizing their belongings into drawers and dressers while James was out on his first night of Head Boy duties. Sirius brought his record player that the Potter’s had bought him for his birthday, along with a few records that he knew Remus would like. The boys worked quietly, listening to the soft guitar strings, the gentle piano melodies.

Sirius wasn’t getting much unpacking done, too busy sneaking glances at Remus beside him, swaying along with the rhythm of the song, humming the chords to himself. He was still awkward in his new body, tripping over the rug, his arms not quite moving in time with his legs, but it was endearing and utterly captivating.

“What do you keep looking at?” Remus finally asked, perking one hand on his hip.

“Huh?”

“You’ve been folding the same t-shirt for the last two songs.”

“I have not,” Sirius tried to say, tossing the black t-shirt aside. When Remus only raised an eyebrow, Sirius sighed. “You’re a terrible dancer.”

Remus crossed his arms on his chest and pouted his lips. Sirius wished he wouldn’t do that. Remus’ lips were entirely too distracting as is, let alone when they’re pressed together, pink and plump. “I’m not a terrible dancer.”

Sirius stood, smiling. “You’ve got no rhythm.”

“And you do?”

“Yes, in fact, I do,” he assured, taking Remus’ hands in his. They took three steps together, waltzing to the swell of the music, before Sirius realized what he was doing and froze, dropping their fingers.

Remus swallowed thickly, his honeyed eyes flickering over Sirius’ face as he came closer. “I don’t know how to waltz. I think I can slow dance, though.”

Even if he didn’t have any rhythm, Sirius let Remus lead, placing his hand on his waist, positioning Sirius’ on his shoulder. It was jarring and stiff at first, four feet shuffling in a small box, muscles taut under curious hands and sweaty palms. Remus stepped on Sirius twice, mumbling an apology each time, but they continued swaying, side to side, side to side, the tension slowly seeping from their bodies.

Sirius wasn’t sure where to look. Remus’ eyes were so tender, so delicate, his body fell numb whenever brown met navy blue. If his glance settled on his neck, Sirius had a front row view of Remus’ pulse thumping rapidly beneath his skin. He decided to close his eyes as his head fell onto Remus’ shoulder, breathing in the familiar scent of tea leaves and yellowed parchment he had come to love.

“I have a question,” Sirius said quietly, glad Remus couldn’t see his cheeks burning the brightest hue of crimson. “Do you think we’ll still be friends when we’re old and wrinkly and can’t remember our names anymore?”

“I’ll never forget your name,” Remus murmured, his fingers tightening in Sirius’ jumper. “Never.”

With a surge of silent courage, Sirius gazed into Remus’ eyes, their foreheads gently pressing together. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Remus whispered, like it was the simplest string of words in the world.

Sirius stopped swaying, pulling Remus closer. He swallowed hard, begging his heart to last just a few more seconds before it exploded. “No, I mean…I really…love you.”

Remus smiled quietly, untangling their fingers and pressing a gentle hand underneath Sirius’ jaw. “I know. And I love you, too.”

They kissed, soft and slow, no telling who started it, only knowing that there was no end in sight.

Sirius’ mother used to tell him _what’s easy is right_ , whenever they’d crawl through Knockturn Alley, dipping in and out of sinister shops that made Sirius’ jaw ache from how hard he had to bite back his words. But truly, she wasn’t lying.

What’s easy _is_ right. Loving Remus is easy, and god, is it so right.


End file.
